flashing lights

The cold, thin air of the Utah mountains is a thing of the past now. The 2008 Sundance Film Festival was a dizzy whirl of wealthy ski bunnies, celebutantes, swag for the privileged, and oh yeah, movies. I think I'm not alone in my feeling that American independent cinema is in a bit of a strange period. Big name actors work for scale, play an addict or someone middle class and it's all very moving and easily packaged and next thing you know they're thanking God or their agents at the Oscars while wearing a get up that cost more than the budget of their film. It's also birthed two niches comedies in recent years--the eccentric geek fish out of water movie and the lovably dysfunctional family episode. These kinds of films are cute, easy to watch, but leave me wanting and expecting more from the hearts and minds of contemporary American filmmakers. Unfortunately the two films I saw were predictable yawns about dysfunctional families (although in completely opposed ways), but the kick about Sundance is everyone is a critic and is willing to share in a collective discussion about what was the best and worst Sundance had to offer. My film geekdom is usually so esoteric that film speak happens too infrequently, but at Sundance there is comfort in all of the film chatter. Put on your warmest parka because this my diary of my weekend at Robert Redford's playground. You think you know but you have no idea...

FRIDAY JANUARY 18
6:08PM Louisville is on the horizon as Nashville becomes the early destination for me and my trusty traveling partner Stephanie B.. We were both on a budget and found that it was cheaper to fly out of Nashville than Louisville. Oh, Louisville International Airport, how you always disappoint.

8:32PM Join friends of Stephanie's boyfriend Steve (yes, I've done the "The Science of Sleep" Stephane/Stephanie joke more than once) for a birthday dinner at a hip boutique restraunt, Mirror. The food is gourmet comfort food with tapas restaurant. Interesting mix, I know. The results were mixed. My Crispy Prosciutto wrapped Cipollini Onions were solid in texture and surprising in taste. However, the stack of food they called my entree left me a little cold because my mashed potatoes were lukewarm at best. I think they called it a "Deconstructed Chicken Breast" that was pan fried with a crispy texture layered over said mashed potatoes and grilled vegetables. The enormous cracked mirror mural facing me was more interesting than my meal. Good, but not the best.

10:45PM Post-dinner cocktails at 3 Crow Bar. Note to self: Ease up on the spending, you're not even in Utah yet.

12:37AM Post-3 Crow Bar cocktails at an establishment down the block (the name eludes me, sorry Stephanie). Damn, I never learn.

SATURDAY JANUARY 19
10:04AM Depart Stephen's for the airport. Layer like there's no tomorrow in anticipation for the bristling weather we're about to face.

4:30PM Layover in Phoenix, Arizona. It must have been 70+ degrees in the airport, thus all of the layers must come off. A quick expensive beer in a sports bar and we're off to Utah. Note to self: Avoid $8 beers at Sundance and must come back to Phoenix. The view from the lounge is gorgeously flat.

6:11PM Arrive in Salt Lake City home of the 2002 Winter Olympics, Mormons, and...I never discover what this town is known for or what goes on culturally.

7:33PM Change into my favorite black turtleneck, my favorite gray Marc Jacobs pants, Old Navy herringbone blazer, and black lace up shoes for a celebratory dinner. Stephanie steps out of the bathroom at the hotel wearing a black turtleneck. Twinsies!

8:17PM Dine at the Biaggi's Ristorante Italiano. High ceilings, low lighting, attractive hostess, this very well could be a scene from "Batman" where the crazed villain interrupts a dinner between Bruce Wayne and some babe. We start with the Stuffed Mushrooms and then I order the Black Fettuccini tossed with lobster, wild mushrooms and a homemade lobster cream sauce and Stephanie goes with the Grilled chicken breast stuffed with imported Italian ham and smoked provolone and gouda cheeses, topped with a lemon-basil butter sauce and served with sauteed asparagus and roasted herb potatoes. Sexy, I know.

12:27AM Pass out with a bottle of Pinot Noir while watching The Best of Tracy Morgan on "Saturday Night Live." Could he be any more hilarious?

SUNDAY JANUARY 20
7:45AM Wake up and realize all I've done so far is eat expensive meals and gab. Must get to Park City after the inclusive (although Stephanie told score us that one) continental breakfast.

11:15AM Attend the Annual Outfest Queer Bunch Party. Yet another opportunity to eat free food and grab some swag. Paris Hilton, Kirsten Dunst, Diddy, Ellen Page, Sharon Stone, and Quentin Tarantino are all rumored to be at this event. Of course none of them were there and sadly our first celebrity sighting was Lance Bass' ex-boyfriend and former "Amazing Race" contestant Reichen Lehmkuhl. The gift bag was also slightly disappointing: pleasure ring, latest issue of Instinct magazine, and a Melissa Etheridge CD. Yeah, that totally puts chicks in the mood.

12:48PM Walking about Main Street, the main drag at Sundance and home to the Egyptian Theater (pictured above) were Colin Farell's film "In Bruges" premiered days before we got there as well as Mary-Kate Olsen's film "The Wackness." Spot Paul Giamatti (who does not like to have his picture taken), Mena Suvari (too much makeup), Jon Foster (the kid Kim Basigner sleeps with to spite her husband in the vastly underrated film "The Door in the Floor"), and Christine Vachon (the bitchin' producer of Todd Haynes films among many other landmark independent films of the '90s). All of a sudden the crowds part for a photoshoot happening on the street. The stringy hair extensions and the prominent fang teeth look familiar...OMG! IT'S BIJOU PHILIPS! For reason or another she's posing against a Volkswagen SUV with a big hand bag, clad in the tightest black jeans and a big puffer jacket. Mouth is agape at this scene.

2:38PM Attempt to get into Michel Gondry's latest film "Be Kind and Rewind" at Eccles Theater. Naturally, it's a favorite with big names and we don't get in. The game that one must play at Sundance if you don't buy tickets in advance goes like this: Show up for a movie with $10, wait in a freezing cold line for a wait list number, obtain number, come back in line a half an hour before the movie starts, and based on how many tickets the film sold the event organizers and handlers will admit however many people in based on the amount of empty seats. Sounds clear and organized, right? A near riot it caused by some guy claiming to be the father of one of the actresses in the next film showing after "Be Kind", the Noam Murro dramedy "Smart People" told on a woman in front of him who let her four teenage daughters cut line after they left "Be Kind and Rewind" midway through. No cutting at Sundance! I'm convinced it's Ellen Page's dad (she's one of the stars of the film) and observe the hilarity of this enraged man as my toes begin to slowly freeze. The wait is over an hour where in I met Paul Dano's agent who just so happened to be standing in front of me in line. She also represents Zach Braff, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, some guy from "Grey's Anatomy" and the crazy mom from "Arrested Development." I beg her to tell me who was the actor Paul Dano replaced on the set of "There Will Be Blood" after weeks into shooting and has since remained a secret. She wouldn't budge but only gave me the tidbit that it was an unknown actor. Was she covering for Shia LaBeouf? It's a possibility.

4:48PM Informed by someone in line that the Amy Adams and Emily Blunt vehicle, "Sunshine Cleaning", is just okay. Ouch. Two likable new stars, how can that go wrong? Amy Redford's directorial debut (daughter of Robert), "The Guitar" starring Saffron Burrows, is also panned by someone in line and said, "it was...very weird" and "everybody was naked in it." Hmmm, sounds interesting to me.

6:17PM Tickets sell out for "Smart People" and there were almost thirty or so people in front of us. There's always Salt Lake.

8:25PM The premiere of Julianne Moore's latest film, "Savage Grace", is playing in Salt Lake at 9:15. Must make it.

8:45PM We get our waist list numbers and they're single digits this time. To celebrate we have a beer across the street at a local microbrewery.

8:52PM While standing in line in what was a surprisingly warm venue, I overhear that "Ballast" was "really dark and really slow, but you know, entertaining" and Alan Ball's "Towelhead" had people walking out of the theater. Where was I for these films?

8:55PM We're warned that this film has a red flag rating and no children are allowed admittance. The film deals with incest and other aberrant forms of sexuality. Everyone in line cheers and claps in unison at the excitement of seeing Julianne Moore make it with her son.

9:03PM The Sundance Fever gets to Stephanie. As I wait for her to return from the restroom, we're getting closer and closer to getting in.

9:04PM The moviegoer who saw "Ballast" is going on and about how she must to get into the theater because God forbid if she doesn't she'll have to go to P.F. Chang's down the street to nurse a glass or wine or two until her friends come out of the movie. She trades places with some guy in line and gets closer to me. Earlier I heard her talking about how she comes to Park City with her husband regularly because they're big skiers and they love getting out of the city for a vacation every once in a while. I'm going to bet she gets her way all the time.

9:07PM Five people in front of me and no Stephanie. AHHHHH!!!

9:12PM Stephanie re-emerges and it's clear she is not well. I offer to leave so we can get back to where we were staying for the night and she can rest. She's a trooper and agrees to see the film.

9:14:21PM We're told no more seats are available. NOOOOO!!!!

9:15PM Wait a minute, there are only three seats available and we were at the head of the line. We get in and scurry to the theater where we come in at the tail end of the director introducing the film and the lights go down. We're in the very front row. Fuck.

To Be Continued...